20 Very Useful Things You Should Be Doing Instead of Watching Big Brother Naija

The debate is on: Big Brother Naija(BBN) reality TV show, to watch or not to watch. What really spurred this debate was that disturbing evidence that it seems like so many folks are already hooked unto the show, albeit secretly.

The naysayers who strongly say people should not watch it have made their point. They argued that the BBN is totally pointless, promotes indecency, teaches nothing… bla… bla… bla… bla…

But the ‘aye aye’ who love the show to bits strongly counters all that by saying, “If you don’t like the show, simply turn your TV off!”

Epic!

Totally!!

I love that!!!

So after listening to both sides of the party and argument, here’s my final verdict.

Sorry guys, but I will go with the naysayers.

Not because of the promotion of immorality point of view of the argument. Me, being somewhat amoralist, I don’t really give an eff whether the show promotes indecency or not, teaches something or not... what else did they say about the show again…?

Yes, I don’t.

So why then would I go with the naysayers?

Okay, listen.

First of all, I don’t see any point in the show.

WARNING: The Big Brother is so happy spying on you and watching you wasting away your life?!

O yes!

I've asked some people on different several occasions to tell me what the show is really all about and all they could tell me was that Big Brother—whoever he or she may be—just wants to show you how people do behave in their homes—most especially when no one is watching!

What?!

Based on that, I can safely conclude that the BBN show is all about PRETENSE. Fact is, you will never really get the true behaviour of people because once anything is done in front of a camera, that very act is very much susceptible to ‘acting’.

So what’s the point there, I ask again?

But that’s not even my main grouse with the TV show.

You see, I am a true businessman and like all businessmen will always tell you, time is money.

True that.

So, the way I see it, the BBNaija show is nothing but a typical classical time waster of a TV show.

Who do I blame now?

Is the youth sitting comfortably at home in front of his TV with all the time in the world in his hand idling away while watching another set of youths playing or should I say, 'acting' for the 25 million naira prize money?

Or…

Should I blame the government that has failed to provide the jobs that will keep these youths very busy?

Well…

Truth is, I don’t really like blaming anyone.

But rather, I try to provide an alternative—a better alternative—yes, the businessman’s way!

So let me tell you now 20 very productive things I will be doing instead of watching Big Brother Naija if I were you.

Take a look…

Call a friend

Yes, I might as well go through my phone book and call a friend.

Check it, there are so many of your friends you may not have talked to in a very long while, right?

Don’t you think they will appreciate it if you give them a call? You know, something like a surprise call?

Good. So do it now. And thank me later.

Do some gym

A healthy mind in a healthy body. I agree, totally.

So I might as well steal the precious time I allocate in staying in front of the TV to just work on my body.

Lift a couple of weights. Jog. Skip. Frog jump. Exercise. Just do any physical activity that will get you sweating and help boost the circulation of blood in your body flowing nicely and also help you beat that sluggishness.

Your body will be better off, believe me.

Write an article

And talking about exercising your body, it won’t be such a bad idea to exercise your mental muscles too.

And what a better way to exercise your mental muscle than by writing an article just like I am writing this very one for you right now?

In writing an article, you will surely and fully engage your focus capacity and thinking powers to boost your general mental prowess. Your power of imagination will equally receive a boost. Your vocabulary might add up a notch.

And the best part?

You will become more intelligent… just like me!

Watching BBNaija will never do any of these gloriously wonderful things for you.

Duhhh!

Dust up my CV

Most likely, I'm assuming you're still looking for a job and that’s the reason why you have so much time on your hands right now.

So well, it’s time to dust up your CV. Time to change or modify the format or style of your CV.

Don’t you think it’s high time you stop sending the same CV to different recruiting agencies or companies?

Please switch off that telly right now and get to work, okay?

Write my business proposal

You don’t even necessarily need a job to survive.

Yes, you can start your own business.

In fact, this is very much advised because the way the world is positioned now, getting a job does not offer the type of security as it used to.

So you will be doing yourself a lot of good if you can figure out multiple ways of earning some more income.

This is why I suggest you write your own business proposal.

Do it now.

Just leave Big Brother Naija alone for now and start thinking about your own life and future.

Do you have any good business idea? What is holding you back from getting it started? Visualize and speculate on how much financial resource you think you will need to get your business off the ground.

Try to have fun in imagining the likely problems you might face in starting up your business and how you can tackle those challenges.

Try to imagine or figure out how you can raise funds or startup capital for your business.

You’ll agree with me that doing things like these is far more productive that wasting a couple of hours of your life that you will never get back again in front of your screen watching other people who may actually be—for all what it’s worth—on their path of business or fame.

So don’t be left behind.

Don’t just sit there and watch the world happen.

Get involved. It’s your own business… your own life… for crying out loud!

  

Catch up on some news

We live in the information age today.

Believe it or not, the only major or remarkable difference between people in terms of their worth, ambition, potential and suchlike these days simply boils down to the information they possess.

So many people do not know what is really going on in the world around them. Thus, when you discuss with them, you easily find out that they are so limited in their thoughts and in their actions.

Don’t be one of such people.

Tune in to the news and get yourself informed.

Do my school assignment

So many students have formed the bad habit of leaving their school assignment undone until the last minute.

Some are waiting for others to do it so that they can copy. Some are hoping that the lecturer will not remember to ask them to submit the assignment. Some don’t even know that an assignment was even given.

Whatever!

But listen to me right now.

Have you ever heard of Parkinson’s law which states that work expands to fill the time available for its completion?

Well, what this law is trying to say is that if you leave your assignment undone, you will find that a time will come when even the smallest assignments will be taking you so many hours to complete because you will thinking of so many other tasks that are equally begging for your attention.

Thus leaving you confused and undecided on which tasks to tackle first thereby increasing the time you will be needing to complete any of the tasks awaiting you.

This is why it’s good you form the habit of tackling your assignments immediately.

Therefore, switch off that television now.

And go and do your assignment right now.

Yes, first things first.

You say wetin...?

That you don't have any assignments?

So what?!

My friend give yourself one and stop making noisy excuses!


Create a blog

Creating a blog is very simple.

Once you decide to start one and you've equally decided on what to blog about, then it’s just a matter of minutes and you’re good to go.

You don’t even need to spend so much money to get going because you can easily create your free blogs on Blogger or WordPress.

In case you may be wondering what you might want to be doing with your blog, then for one, through your blog, you can easily express your feelings or share your opinions on any issue you find interesting just like I am doing right now.

You can easily become an authority or even famous just by sharing your ideas or thoughts on that particular issue with your blog.

Blogging is also part of the reason why I mentioned earlier you should write articles because blogging on its own can actually and easily become a full time career for you, who knows?

I don’t want to mention that you can earn some money from your blog but then, you can never rule that angle out since it has been proven over and over again that money motivates a lot of men—and women, of course.

So what are you waiting for?

Go ahead and become a blogger at once.

Good news: you don’t even need to write any application letter or CV for that!

Make a YouTube video

Yes, go ahead and make that video on YouTube.

It won’t even cost you a thing... maybe, apart from your time.

What is that thing you’ve been dying to teach others? What is that very thing or things that you’ve always wanted to discuss with people? What is that product you’ve been trying to advertise or tell people about? What is that music video or skit or challenge you’ve made that you’ve been trying to showcase to the world?

Go ahead and teach or discuss or share it with them using your YouTube channel.

It will serve your ministry better because you can even make some money or become famous too just by doing that rather than just sitting your lazy ass there on the cushion 24-7 watching a bunch of youths fooling around in a house for 90 good days all in the name of winning 25 million naira prize money!

In fact, why must you always be the one watching others?

Why can’t others watch you?

I mean, c’mon, why can’t you just do something worthwhile and meaningful that others will want to watch—about you?

Think about that.

Make plans for the next day

Are you aware that every new day is nothing but a second chance to better your previous performance?

Well… a very good though simple way to check how far you’ve gone in life is by taking a total tally of how your particular day went at the end of each blessed day.

Did you achieve those things you set out to achieve?

How satisfactorily did it go, assuming you did achieve them?

And what happened that made you not to achieve them, assuming you didn’t? These are the type of things you should form a habit of doing.

And when you are through with checking how the day went, you can then make plans for the next day. What things did you do wrong that prevented you from achieving your set goals for that very day? How can you make amends, if the need be? What things will you like to achieve in the coming days?

That is exactly how successful people do it.

They live and plan for today… and tomorrow... and the day after tomorrow...

Wash my dirty clothes

I know it always so good to wear some fresh clean clothes or don’t you think so?

So why don’t you use this opportunity to wash your dirty clothing?

You say wetin?

That you have a washing machine?

And so?

We all do but…

I hope you know the washing machine can never be as good as your two strong hands squeezing the life out of that your dirty and foul smelling boxers, singlets, socks, panties and bras you’ve been wearing for the past 14 days or more?

Clean or tidy my house

Still on the subject of cleaning out your dirt, tell me, when was the last you took your time to tidy up your house?

Why not do it now?

Cleanliness is next to Godliness, they say.

So make your whole environment clean, please.

Don't just stop there. Remember your kitchen too. Those dirty plates there are not going to wash themselves. Even your toilet too. They all need to look clean. So get to work.

Believe me; the sight of a clean surrounding alone will certainly give you more joy and satisfaction than watching any scene of the BBNaija.

Try it now and see for yourself.

If your whole surrounding is totally clean, what about your car?

You say wetin?

That you don’t have a car yet?

No problem. Just go and wash your neighbour’s own, okay? At least, he will thank you so much. And if he is kind enough, he may buy you some food or even dash you his old shirt or jeans.

I would have said probably he'll dash you some money too but I heard people don’t normally dash other people money easily these days because of the recession in the land, but who knows, your neighbour might not have that stingy Nigerian mindset... like you.

Lol.

Pray

I’ve noticed that this is some people’s favorite activity.

So why don’t you just go ahead and pour your heart out to God.

He will answer you… if you believe.

But please, don't disturb those of us who always like to pray silently in spirit and in truth, okay?

Good and fine.

And while you are praying, please don’t forget to ask him to free you of this terrible demonic spirit of lust, which is probably what keeps driving you to watch the BBNaija even when you’ve already promised yourself not to watch that nonsense show again.

Lol.

Cook

Just cook something.

Try your hands on a new recipe or something.

I am so sure someone in your family will surely appreciate that you cooked for them.

Even if they don’t, I know I will.

And I will be so happy to join in your feast if you will be kind enough to even remember to invite me. As long the food you prepared is not too pepperish or salty.

But please o, if it so happens you like salty or pepperish foods, please just don’t bother to invite me. Carry go! Enjoy alone! It's allowed!

God knows that even though I'm a confirmed gourmet but I don't enjoy that sort of kindness at all from you, or from anyone else as a matter of fact.

Learn and memorize some interesting facts

The more interesting things you know, the more interesting things you will like to know and most importantly, the more interesting your entire life is bound to become.

So what do you know?

Current affairs wise, where do you stand?

Do you know that there are places on this planet where you can never experience night fall? Now tell me, is the capital of Iowa Boise or Des Moines? In fact, how many US States can you comfortably name their capitals? Which country has Tirana as its capital? How many feet make a yard? How many furlongs make a mile? How many pounds make a ton? How many zeroes are there in a quintillion?

Go online and read up some more interesting facts man, and stop wasting away your time all in the name of watching that brain-dulling TV show called BBNaija.

Just in case you don’t know it already, this is exactly what those people who appear on Who Wants to Be A Millionaire TV game show do with their precious time!

And the best part is that they stand a chance of winning 10 million naira from MTN!

Watch Nat Geo Wild

Wild life can be so interesting. I know that so far, if you've noticed, I've been advising you to walk away from your TV set.

But let's say you find doing that quite difficult and you've decided you must watch something on the TV, then why don’t you go for something you can really really enjoy because of its educative nature?

Studying nature will surely show you why God is truly great, assuming you don’t know that already. It will surely make you feel alive.

Do you know how crocodile launches into death roll to tear up its victim so that you can save yourself assuming—God forbid—you are lucky enough to be attacked by a croc one day?

Or do you know what exactly to do immediately assuming you're lucky enough—but God forbid—a cobra spits into your eyes or a mamba or rattle snake or viper bites you on your buttocks?

Ha ha ha...

Have you seen what a cross breed between a tiger and a lion which is called a liger really looks like? Do you even know that such an animal do exist? Now, can you differentiate correctly between a crocodile and an alligator? Do you even know how to avoid an elephant or rhino or hippopotamus attack?

I tell you, you will learn so many interesting things about nature by just watching this channel.

Frankly speaking, to me, it is more engaging than watching a bunch of youths walking around aimlessly in a house and you even call that entertainment.

Crap!

Watch Discovery Channel

Similar to Nat Geo Wild, there are so many engaging programs you can watch on Discovery Channel. I recently started watching Ultimate Survival featuring Mr. Michael ‘Bear’ Grylls, a world renowned adventurer!

It is a very interesting program. You will learn some basic survival instincts from such a program assuming you find yourself one day in a place where there is no water, food or clothing.

In fact, the show alone will toughen you up mentally while at the same time increase your capacity to think fast and to take certain life saving risks when you are faced with a very difficult or life threatening situation, I swear. 

I also like watching How Things Are Made. Science can be quite intriguing, you know?

Now tell me the truth, joke apart, what exactly can you say you do learn from watching BBNaija?

How to kiss like Thin Tall Tony and Aunty Bisola, abi?

Nwoke m, you see yo’r life now!?

Tufiakwa!!!

Watch the real stuff

Shhh… yes I said it. Listen. So, you think you can deceive us, abi? So you think we don't know the real reason why you are stuck up on watching that BBNaija abi?

Bros, why don’t you just go ahead and watch the real stuff instead of just sitting there, hopelessly waiting and endlessly hoping something you already know won’t happen is going to happen?

Go online. You know those sites. As their usual customer I know that you are, I don’t think I need to mention those sites to you because you already know them.

So go there and download some good stuff. Or if you are not that ashamed, you may ask your friends to transfer some to you with Xender.

And then find somewhere quiet and proceed to wąnk yourself off to your total satisfaction as usual.

If the stuff you got is real good, trust me, you will be feeling so sleepy such that you won’t even remember BBNaija again.

Yeah, speaking from experience.

Besides, you know sound sleep is very good for your health too?

So don't be ashamed, okay? You will be doing yourself more good than harm in the process.

Stroll

Yeah. Leave your house. Stroll. It’s a form of exercise. Catch some fresh air. Catch some sun. Or moon. Or whatever.

Just leave your house and take a moment to see what is really happening outside.

Visit your friend. Or friends. Find out what they are really up to. Human company can be a refreshing at times, you know?

And the last but not the least…

Blame Buhari

Yes, I know I said it earlier that I don’t like blaming anyone but I think your case is different. I know you like blaming others. So why don’t you just go ahead and blame Buhari once more?

At least, if not for anything, like a favorite sport, chance are, it gives you joy… I mean; so much joy!

So, what exactly are you still waiting for right now?

Go to the bar or simply just get online now and join the 'blame Buhari' party.

Don’t miss out.

Blame the nigga for the rising cost of food prices, blame him for closing the borders and banning the importation or cars through land borders, blame him for the downwards slide of our naira. Blame the nigga for implementing BVN and stamp duty tax. In fact, just go ahead and blame the nigga for not allowing harmattan to come at the right time and for losing your hard earned money to MMM! In fact, you can blame him for your friend who fell into the gutter last night after drinking ten bottles of Gulder!

Nothing do you!

And please, no matter what, just make sure you are having so much fun.

Just know that you have my FULL support!

Alright, that will be that for now.

See you later...